Sekdek, Frillici & Van Halen, Pro Se is a fictional or conceptual entity for creative and illustrative purposes. It is not a licensed law firm, nor does it offer legal services or representation to any party. All legal filings, decisions, and responsibilities lie solely with Brice Frillici, who represents himself pro se in any actual legal matters.
Sekdek, Frillici & Van Halen, Pro Se maintains a deliberately opaque legal paradigm wherein byzantine procedural tactics coalesce with unorthodox interpretative methodologies to further our single-minded pursuit of pro se advocacy for our founding principal. Our operational ethos resides at the crossroads of esoteric jurisprudence and febrile self-interest: Each motion, petition, and intricately footnoted memorandum emerges from a torrential vortex of statutory cross-references, rhetorical obfuscations, and degenerate revelry.
Certain partners (whose authority remains indefinite) conduct late-night 'strategy sessions' where rules of civil procedure intermingle with questionable mystagogic godspeed, culminating in labyrinthine briefs so dense that even the most seasoned clerk might doubt the very foundations of common man's law. Walk tall and always carry a flat black leather-skinned capcase.
"This is the war, man. The war against the weak." – Fight Club (1999)
Indeed, we disclaim all pretensions to formal licensure lest we imperil the delicate balance of our performative existence. Exactly—our Chris Burden begets our Abramović, as the violent, raw sacrament of one leads to the existential transcendence of the other. Where Burden's Shoot is the body offered as martyrdom, a living bullet wound seared into memory, Abramović's Rhythm 0 becomes its spiritual descendent—a ceremonial stripping of identity as she relinquishes control to her audience, daring them to confront their darkest instincts. In this lineage, the thread is clear: suffering as spectacle, vulnerability as confrontation, and pain as a portal to revelation. One's endurance births the other's catharsis, a bloodline of performance art where violence is not just endured—it is exalted.
Instead, we embolden ourselves with voluminous citations to obscure appellate precedents, strategic insertions of res ipsa loquitur at high-decibel rhetorical junctures, and a general penchant for flamboyant legal flourish so overwrought that we risk drifting into metaphysical territory.
We do not represent third-party clients, nor do we extend any services beyond the hermetically sealed realm of our principal's existential litigation endeavors. To the untrained eye, our conference room—where dusty treatises and pox-soaked blanketry teeter precariously on towers of overly smoked cigarettes—may appear a chaotic sepulcher of profane dissolution. In truth, it is a sanctioned crucible of doctrinal experimentation: an unholy union of borderline mania and entrenched procedural knowledge that grants our firm its relentlessly unorthodox power.
Sekdek, Frillici & Van Halen, Pro Se is neither a licensed law firm nor a purveyor of legal counsel. A tangential impression of professional aptitude is incidental to our core mission, which is exclusively the pro se representation of our founder. All references, titles, and organizational hierarchies are vessels of invention. They should be interpreted only through the lens of delusional grandeur, not genuine legal engagement. Yet, the powerful surge of our unbridled will—fueled by a tenacious appetite for unorthodox jurisprudence—shall reverberate across every hollow bastion of doubt, subjugating all who dare oppose us beneath the crushing weight of our resolute delirium and unstoppable malignant mayhem.
In this room, civility dies. Like Frank Galvin in The Verdict, we don't rise to recite sterile statutes—we rise to obliterate the opposition with precision, fury, and the weight of truths too damning to ignore. Imagine Galvin's trembling hand gripping the table, voice cracking under the weight of righteous despair, before exploding into his final, devastating plea: "You know what the truth is? You're the law, not them." The energy we summon not with mercy, but with the cold-blooded intent of exposing hidden flaws and fractured lies. We'll make a naked promise: there will be no courtroom decorum left to salvage.
We do not accept retainer agreements, court appointments, or the moral high ground—only the labyrinthine complexities of self-representation. Proceed at your intellectual peril.
